Monday, November 8, 2010

Ever so Grateful...

In February, I will have been married for 11 years. In that time, I have learned so much about whom I am and what is truly important in this life. The one thing that Im sure of and it’s this: Love is so extremely important in our lives. It is what inspires us to create lavish dishes, orchestrate timeless ballads and change our life’s course to meet the otherwise unattainable expectations of those we love so dearly. Without love, our soft, giving dispositions tend to all too often solidify into an unrecognizable jaded distain for life and everything it has to offer.
I was talking to some friends from my past this morning, who have genuinely had difficult lives. Although they are still pressing onward, it is quite evident that they have been mistreated, and that, as a result, they are more inclined to deprive others of the love they have to offer, rather than run the risk of getting hurt again. A vicious cycle, perpetuated by their abuse, by those individuals initially considered trustworthy, the depravation of love can only bring about more of the same.
For instance, a young boy is mistreated by his parents and deprived of the loving and nurturing experiences that teach him how to love himself, grows to a man. As an adult, the boy does not have an understanding of the importance of love and in return, does not have the capacity to offer this important sustenance to his girlfriend or wife. Instead, he replaces the patience, love and understanding that would otherwise be there, with frustration, rage and abusive actions.
Love is so very important in our lives. It is extremely important that we receive it. And in return, as we gain an understanding of its effects, we will feel compelled to freely administer it to those around us. I feel that this is the only way to break the vicious cycle. Someone has to start giving in order for the poison to be extracted, so to speak. This charitable emotion is one of action, which can truly help us heal ourselves and those around us. Just like any other healing device, some require, and will take a great deal more, for a much longer period of time, before the affects thereof begin to manifest.
In closing, as easy as it is for me to say, allow yourself to love freely. Forgive others swiftly. It will make you so much happier. Be patient with those who recoil from your loving gestures. They have their own demons they are dealing with. Recognize situations and relationships for what they are/were. Look for learning moments, retain them and dispose of the negative. My loving wife April always says, resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person gets sick. Let it go and move on. Know that there is a higher being who loves you unconditionally, everyday. He is waiting to hear from you, everyday. If you are looking for someone to lean on, who is trustworthy of your love, who won’t hurt you and who will listen, He is the one for you…everyday.